number 6

i've just had a bit of a brain wave of an idea to talk about on this... my next blog.

i had actually gone to bed when i thought of it, but had to get up and write in case i forgot, which is annoying as it's late and i've got to be up for work early tomorrow - especially early as i'm going to have to have a shave in the morning to ensure i don't get mistaken for a passing vagrant (drifter if you will) when i arrive at work and get given a cup of cold tea and the crusts from an old loaf of bread and then escorted off the premises before being given the opportunity to explain my late night, didn't have time to shave conundrum... i also forgot to make my sandwhiches and will now have to do so whilst making breakfast

anway the more i ramble on about this the less time i get sleeping and the more tired i will be at work tomorrow, the more tired i am the colder i tend to be (i work in a very well ventilated room) which results in me putting on my jacket and repeatedly being asked "are you not staying?" in a witty sarcastic kind of way...

ahem... my idea...

i've often thought about silence and so i'm going to use this internet medium to share my thoughts about it, a little ironic you might think... talking about silence?! you could say its like rain on your wedding day, but then again you probably wouldn't

silence... there's a thin line between a close relationship with a friend/family member, and one that has not yet begun to form or has hit some problems when it comes to silence... think about it, how do you feel when you are silent with someone, is it awkward? is it comfortable? (i might add here that these thoughts were the ones that lead to me coining the phrase "hmmm... this is awkward?!" which got grossly overused, became expected at every pause for breath and subsequently isn't funny any more - for anyone unfamiliar with this the idea is to say the above phrase quietly to one's self when a conversation with someone reaches a natural end or pause)

now then, i like the idea of silences with a close friend, there's something very reassuring about being able to sit silently with someone, enjoying each others company without feeling the pressure to speak, its comforting, just being there.... especially if you seem to be able to tell what the other person is thinking and you can both silently appreciate that thought.... you feel like soulmates for a bried telepathic moment (tried to think of a better word than soulmates but couldn't - sorry, hope you get the idea)

however, the same silence with an unfamiliar can strike fear and terror into the hearts of even the strongest, mightiest and most muscular men (...and women - don't want to get the equal opportunities for sexes people on my back...) i shared such a moment with an uncle of mine at a family gathering at the weekend, it was horrible, we looked at each other both recognising discomfort rising through us, needing to find a way out but unsure what to do (haha maybe i should have said "hmmmm... this is awkward....?!") in the end we stuck to the most minimilist (moby would be proud) of all small talk and offered our two cents (what does this phrase mean?) on the weather

you get the idea... my challenge is thus: at what point do you pass over the line with someone where you can leave the anxious, sweaty (cold sweat of course!) moments behind and actually begin to enjoy those comfortable natural silences with an acquaintence? can you do this at all? have you reached that point with me yet?

golly its late, hehe there's an owl hooting outside my window, how quaint (the little blighter - i'm not sure if this word is considered to be offensive or not, please let me know - better not keep me up all night!!) i best leave you to your own devices now as i have to be at work in a few hours (sorry for another long one, i am yet to be able to keep these things compact and presice).

enjoy